Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Caring for my parents!

Rose has gone to Chile for 3 weeks with Martin and Andrea. John leaves to day to join her. I've have the opportunity to go help with my parents for a few days. I have even more gratitude and appreciation for all that Rose and John do for them. Mom loves having someone from the family to reminisce with. I think it is interesting that she always speaks about the positive things in her life. I don't know if that is a conscious effort on her part or if she just doesn't remember the negative things. She can be delightful if you don't mind hearing the same stories several times a day. Her eyes just light up when she tells you some of her growing up stories about her dad, mom and sisters. She can get very animated when she talks about meeting my dad for the first time.

She can be very helpful caring for dad. She's always right there when he needs something and I think she is the only one who knows how to stop his coughing when he chokes. She puts her hand somewhere on his back and rubs and voila, he stops choking - albeit just for a few minutes. You do have to watch her because she will forget and try to feed him part of her sandwich (he's on thickened pureed foods). Sometimes when dad takes an extra long time to eat you might catch her eating some of his dinner. That can be a serious problem if she eats his applesauce which has his medicine crushed into it. She is a pretty high functioning person with alzheimers, but you do have to watch her carefully.


Dad was having hard time smiling and keeping his eyes open at the same time. But after a few tries this is what we got. He is struggling. He is getting harder and harder to move. We can get him to his feet, but his knees bend a lot and he is having trouble moving his feet. I sometimes stand behind him and hold him up while mom stands him front and guides him holding his hands. During the hot weather, we discovered that if he doesn't get enough fluids, he gets very sleepy and it is hard to keep him awake even during his meals. But, he is still an angel to care for. At one point I felt prompted to tell him that when it is his time to go, we promises to take good care of mom and see that she gets the best of care. He, in his whisper of a voice, said "I appreciate that."


One of their favorite things to do is go out in the yard in their swing. They will sit, hold hands and talk for an hour or so, until dad gets uncomfortable.


They love when family drops by. Maria and Eric came to visit them on their way home from Seaside last week. Before they got here, she kept saying, "Now who is coming?". I'd explain that it was my daughter, Maria and her husband, Eric. I could tell she could not remember exactly who they were. But, after they left she could remember very well who they are.

It is a pleasure to visit and care for them. I do hope I age as sweet and appreciative as they are.